Eccentricities of the English Language
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Stretch lingo:

seen on signs around the world
next
The drug store opposite the bus terminal
Terminal Drugs
Perth, Australia:
Special Chicken
Cooked in cholesterol
Free cottonseed oil
UK Army rifle range
No Shooting
At a number of US military bases
Restricted to unauthorized personnel.
A Pennsylvania cemetery
Persons are prohibited
from picking flowers
from any but
their own grave.
On the grounds of a private school
No trespassing without permission.
At the front gate of a cemetery:
No exit at other end
A New York restaurant
Customers who find our
waitresses rude ought
to see the manager.
A Maine restaurant
Open 7 days a week and weekends.
On the menu of a restaurant
Blackened bluefish
A loan company
Ask about
our plans for
owning your home.
New Hampshire restaurant
Now serving live lobsters
Massachusetts area for birdwatchers
Parking for birds only.
On a Baltimore estate
Trespassers will be
prosecuted to the full
extent of the law.
- Sisters of Mercy
In a New York medical building
Mental Health Prevention Center
In a New York drugstore
We dispense with accuracy.

New York convalescence:
For the sick and tired of
the Episcopal Church

A long established dry cleaning store
Thirty-eight years on the same spot.
Collision Zone strictly enforced 
 

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Contributions to The Langwidge this year:

Sol Squire, David Lawton

And see acknowledgments from previous years

Harry Potter - A Guide

Quagga Books

Ask Anon - Honest Advice

Weirdity

Guide to Flaming

20 May 2008 | |
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